Tell any group of people that stepparents are about one hundred times more likely to fatally abuse their children than are “true” parents and you can’t expect an easy audience — especially if you suggest that the key factor could just be the lack of a genetic relationship. So the questions rained down thick and fast on Canadian psychologists Martin Daly and Margo Wilson when they floated these conclusions (gleaned from their twenty years of research) at a Darwin Seminar at the London School of Economics. The questions were as varied as the audience of scientists, historians, undergraduates, and interested passersby that these provocative seminars invariably attract.

“How can you know such a thing?” people asked. “What makes you think that genetic relationships play a part, as opposed to a hundred other possible confounding variables, such as the poverty of the parents and the duration of contact between parent and child?” “What about adopted children?” “What use is such information, anyway?” “Aren’t you just stirring things up for no good reason?”

Daly and Wilson, from McMaster University, Hamilton, Ontario, did not arrive at their conclusions casually. In the 1970s, about ten years after the “battered child syndrome” had been officially recognized, they set out to see if children were more likely to be abused by stepparents than by biological parents. In addition, they wanted to explore a specific Darwinian hypothesis. There had been new developments in Charles Darwin’s idea that human behavior, as well as our physical appearance, has been shaped to a significant extent by natural selection. In particular, in the 1960s, William D. Hamilton, now professor of zoology at Oxford University, had put a new construction on the phenomenon of altruism — the process by which individuals apparently sacrifice their own self-interest, and even their lives, to benefit others.

Hamilton showed that natural selection could and would favor genes that promoted altruistic behavior, provided that the individuals who benefited from the altruism had a high chance of containing the same genes. In fact, such altruistic behavior is not altruistic at all, in the sense that moral philosophers use the term, but is entirely selfish. The gene that promotes the apparent self-sacrifice is simply promoting its own replication, by enhancing the survival of copies of itself — albeit copies contained in other individuals. Thus, said Hamilton, we might expect individuals to compromise themselves if doing so benefited their own kin, who would indeed contain copies of the gene that promoted the self-sacrificial behavior. The final mist is that parental care, and the self-sacrifice that goes with it, are merely special examples of the altruism that any organism might be expected to show toward its own kin.

Although stepparents in some societies are related to the children, Daly and Wilson reasoned that stepparents are not generally kin to their stepchildren, at least not in most Western societies. Therefore, we might expect that they would show no predilection to sacrifice themselves (in large or even small ways) on a stepchild’s behalf. They sought to find out if this hypothesis, based on Hamilton’s extension of Darwin’s ideas, was true.

Wilson says, “We were astonished to find that it was not easy even to begin to explore this hypothesis. Official statistics from the United States didn’t reveal whether parents who abused children were step or biological. It just didn’t occur to criminologists that the nature of the relationship was important, so they generally didn’t bother to record it.” She and Daly had to took beyond the official statistics, to the raw data of case histories. By 1980 they had demonstrated that children under three years of age are at least seven times more likely to be abused by stepparents than by biological parents.

Daly and Wilson believed, however, that statistics for child abuse in general might be biased by underreporting or incomplete reporting. After all, parents don’t want to admit that they have beaten their children; there are plenty of ways to conceal abuse or to explain away injuries. To gain a truer picture, the researchers decided to focus specifically on a form of abuse that is exceedingly difficult to cover up: homicide. Once again — even more astonishingly — most official statistics, including the FBI’s Supplementary Homicide Reports, the U.S. national archive, did not differentiate between killings by stepparents or by biological parents. But Statistics Canada from 1974 to 1990 did contain relevant data.

Its figures showed that children under the age of two were at least one hundred times more likely to be killed by stepparents — particularly stepfathers — than by biological parents.

“Of course,” Daly stresses, “most stepparents take to the task extremely well, and generally make loving substitute parents. The incidence of abuse is low.” Nonetheless, for stepparents the homicide rate comes out at about 600 per million parent-child groups living together, compared with just a handful for biological parents. Further examination of records in the United States and Britain revealed an increased risk for children with stepparents. Moreover, a closer look at the case histories reveals that while biological parents who kill their children are often severely depressed and, Daly and Wilson reported, “may even construe murder-suicide as a humane act of rescue,” stepparents who are homicidal “are rarely suicidal and typically manifest their antipathy to their victims in the relative brutality of their lethal acts.”

That there is a difference in incidence of fatal abuse between stepparents and genetic parents seems undeniable, but what are the reasons for it? Daly and Wilson have explored all the obvious, possibly confounding variables of the kind that their Darwin Seminar audience seized upon. Is poverty the real cause? Certainly, it is a risk factor in child abuse. And the breakup of previous marriages that often lies behind stepparentage obviously can be costly, reducing economic status. But, according to Daly and Wilson, the case histories show that child homicide is vastly greater among stepparents than biological parents at an levels of wealth. Poverty emerged as an independent, additional factor, but a relatively weak one.

Well, is remarriage itself then a factor, suggesting some fickleness of personality that might predispose a person to abuse? Apparently not. The case histories show that people who remarry typically continue to treat their own children well even when they abuse their stepchildren. Or does the difference lie in early opportunities for bonding? Are biological parents conditioned to respond well to their children because they are exposed to them from birth? “There isn’t much evidence on this,” says Wilson, “because not many stepparents see their stepchildren at a very early age, so it is hard to make a direct comparison. The few cases there are — although not statistically significant — suggest that stepfathers are at least as likely to abuse their stepchildren even when they are present at the actual birth.”

Don’t adopted children provide a cogent comparison since, as with stepchildren, they are generally unrelated to their substitute parents? In fact, their risk is roughly the same as with natural parents. Surely this negates the notion that the added risk of stepparentage has genetic origins? “It might seem to,” Daly acknowledges, “but there are two big, additional factors in adoption. First, adopting parents are obviously highly motivated and extremely closely monitored before they take on a child. Second, they tend to return children to adoption agencies far more often than is generally appreciated.” This would weed out “unbonded” adoptive parents. So, although the data from families with adopted children appear to contradict the Darwinian idea that lack of genetic relationship reduces the likelihood of care, confounding variables make direct comparison impossible.

To test the genetic hypothesis to the full, Daly and Wilson asked their own question in reverse. Why is it that the overwhelming majority of stepparents treat their stepchildren well? After all, parenthood is a huge investment, an enormous burden to shoulder for the genetic offspring of somebody else. In Darwinian terms, at least, parenting means one thing only: perpetuating yourself by reproduction. But Daly says, “We know that when some other male animals take over a new family they will kill any existing offspring of previous matings — as male lions will do. It’s easy to see why: it is in their own genetic interests to impregnate the females themselves, and existing cubs simply get in the way. Not all male animals behave this way. Incoming male baboons, for example, treat existing children well. This seems to be part of the mating effort; the females will not accept males that do not demonstrate parenting skills. This model seems to fit the human case as well. But, although stepparents do take on the task, Darwinians would predict that the full expression of parental feeling is liable to be buffered. Sometimes it’s buffered too much.”

Daly and Wilson reiterate that the overall rate of homicide by all parents of their children is low, and that most stepparents treat their new families well. Nevertheless, stepparentage emerges not only as a key risk factor in parental child abuse and homicide, but as the biggest factor. The Darwinian hypothesis — that the explanation may lie in the lack of familial relationship, and not primarily in economic or social factors — has stood up so far to the more obvious criticisms.

Finally we can ask — as the Darwin Seminar audience did — “Of what use is such knowledge? After all, most stepparents are good parents, so what good does it do to target them?” Margo Wilson answers, “In general we feel that it is better to know than not to know. It must be bad in principle to shy away from discovery just because the knowledge gained may seem uncomfortable. In fact, we can envisage good, practical reasons for this kind of knowledge. For one thing, social workers worldwide are invariably overworked. Anything that might help them to focus their efforts more accurately has to be worthwhile. And it can’t be good that everyone has been overlooking the biggest risk factor for so long.

“We might also suggest that a mother who is thinking of remarrying should bear in mind that she cannot take her new partner for granted; she cannot expect that he will automatically treat her children as if they were his own. Actually women know this already of course — but perhaps the point needs more emphasis.”

In short, if Wilson and Daly’s ideas are applied sensibly and humanely (and are not used to make stepparents feel bad), then, in principle, they could save much human misery and perhaps human life. If this proves to be so, then those who object to this kind of insight should acknowledge that by objecting, they are allowing human suffering to take place unnecessarily — and they should take moral responsibility for so doing.

As for the Darwin Seminars, they provide one of the best forums yet devised for academics in Darwinian studies to take their ideas beyond their own scientific discipline and expose them to experts from other fields — and, vitally, to the public at large. The Seminars, established at the London School of Economics two and a half years ago by Helena Cronin, are open to everyone and are already acknowledged on both sides of the Atlantic as intellectual and social salons of key importance. Cronin is herself a scholar of the new “evolutionary psychology” and author of The Ant and the Peacock: Altruism and Sexual Selection from Darwin to Today, a reappraisal of Darwin’s idea of sexual selection. She says, “Darwin always wanted his ideas ‘to throw light on man,’ and we aim to help realize his dream. We don’t yet know how much light Darwinian hypotheses win spread, but there’s already good reason to think they will be very illuminating indeed. Daly and, Wilson’s studies are among those showing that the ideas win be useful too. They can save lives.”

Colin Tudge is a science writer and research fellow in the Centre for Philosophy at the London School of Economics. His latest book on human evolution is The Day Before Yesterday (Simon and Schuster).

Colin Tudge “Relative danger“. Natural History. FindArticles.com. 27 Jan, 2010. http://findarticles.com/p/articles/mi_m1134/is_n8_v106/ai_20147994/

Mental Health “Expert” Claims That Child Sexual Abuse is Rarely Painful or Terrifying

Psychologist and associate at Harvard University, Susan A. Clancy, proposes in her new book that it is not the sexual abuse itself that causes trauma, but “the narrative that is later imposed on the abuse experience.” She writes in a letter to the Boston Globe, “For children, sexual abuse is rarely painful or terrifying at the time it occurs.”

Pedophiles and child sexual abusers have often tried to assert that children are not traumatized and harmed by the sexual abuse. Perpetrators say the child develops problems because of society’s view of sexual abuse. Clancy appears to share this belief and says that most victims do not report fear or panic.  I have to question where she gets her interview subjects because, out of the hundreds of survivors of child sexual abuse that I have corresponded with, virtually every one of them has expressed feeling some kind of fear, panic, terror, or they dissociated from the abuse because their mind could not handle the trauma.

Clancey alleges that the child usually only experiences confusion because the child does not understand the sexual encounter, and she says that because the child usually sexually accommodates the perpetrator, the child will feel intense shame when they become an adult and are told by professionals and society that the abuse was wrong.

Clancy has titled her book, The Trauma Myth. This was her first mistake. She is already saying with her title, “It is a myth that children are traumatized by child sexual abuse.” She is essentially saying that the rape,  sodomy, and sexual violation of a child’s body does not harm the child, is not painful for the child, and does not create fear or terror.

Ms. Clancy has obviously never been raped by a full grown man when she was a child, or vaginally penetrated with a foreign object by her father or step-father. She has obviously never endured being straddled by a man four times her size while she sleeps, only to be awakened by one of his hands over her mouth, and the other groping her vagina. Susan Clancy has never been forced by her older brother to perform oral sex on her own sister. These kind of cases are not rare –any mental health expert knows that. For this psychologist to say that it is a “myth” that child sexual abuse is not traumatizing, is not only ignorant but it places children in danger. This belief system places countless children in harm’s way because pedophiles and child sexual abusers will embrace this “myth” theory and use it to sexually violate children.

Ms. Clancy, I can attest to the fact that many children do feel pleasure mixed with confusion over being sexually assaulted by an adult. I was a victim of incest and rape by my father, and I have felt the inner turmoil and feeling through my body like melted butter when my father touched me sexually -and later in my childhood- when his rapes turned into sexual intimacy with my own dad, it felt good. However, contrary to your ignorant opinion, and contrary to the endless amounts of evidence –rape, sodomy, and a toddler having a man’s penis shoved down its throat is NOT rare, NOR a myth. If you are saying that forced fellatio is not traumatizing for the child, then someone ought to revoke your license. Contrary to your absolutely irresponsible belief system, when my father first placed his penis in my mouth at age three, I was traumatized, choked, and terrified. When he raped me on a cold bathroom floor at age seven, and I thought I was dying because I did not know what was happening to me, I experienced terror beyond description.

Ms. Clancy, if trauma experienced by a victim of child sexual abuse  is a myth then how do you explain the millions of survivors of child sexual abuse who have Post Traumatic Stress Disorder so severely, that it affects their entire lives with abnormal fears, flashbacks, panic attacks, nightmares, nervous system disorders, ringing in the ears, chest pain, insomnia, bladder problems, heart trouble, exaggerated startle response and hypervigilance? These survivors developed their trauma-based symptoms because their vagina or rectum was ripped open by a man’s penis, or from having a penis shoved down their tiny mouth, or by having their chest nearly crushed by a man’s body when he climbed into bed with them and lay his heavy body on top of them. Some of them were traumatized by sexually degenerate women who violently abused their bodies, like Greg Milligan, whose mother beat his genitals when she could not have an orgasm with him.

You are correct Ms. Clancy, I liked the pleasure, affection and attention that I received from some of the abuse that I endured by my father, but I also experienced deep confusion and guilt, not because of what society taught me about child sexual abuse, and not because of anyone in my family telling me it was wrong –but  because, as a child, I instinctually knew that what was happening between my father and me was wrong. I knew as a child that it was unnatural. More importantly, I experienced a tremendous amount of pain and fear during those years –enough to induce decades of PTSD symptoms that eventually stopped my life and sent me to countless medical doctors and mental health experts.

Please also see: Harvard Psychologist Says Children Are Willingly Abused

I urge all survivors of severe child sexual abuse, all victims of adult rape, and all parents to write Susan Clancy and tell her what you feel about this book and its title. You can reach her by writing:

Susan A. Clancy

Associate of Psychology

William James Hall

33 Kirkland Street

Cambridge, MA 02138

In the letter to the editor reprinted below, The Leadership Council’s advisory board member Dr. Philip Kinsler responded to a Boston Globe Letter to the editor by Dr. Susan Clancy, in which she stated, “For children, sexual abuse is rarely painful or terrifying at the time it occurs.”

Children are Harmed by Sexual Abuse

The Boston Globe
Letters to the Editor
Children are Harmed by Sexual Abuse
February 27, 2005

AS A PROFESSIONAL who has devoted many years to trying to aid in the healing of child sexual abuse survivors, I was surprised by the peremptory tone and deficient scholarship in Susan Clancy’s Feb. 20 letter regarding child sexual abuse (”The concept of repression”).

The notion that child sexual abuse is usually not harmful is ignorant at best and provides pernicious support to pedophiles at worst. This pseudoscience was thoroughly debunked in the controversy over the infamous Rind study in 1998 alleging similar notions to Clancy’s. Clancy states she does ”not believe that repression exists.”

Personal belief does not belong in scientific discussions.

There are more than 85 studies in the literature, conducted using multiple research paradigms, that verify the phenomenon of fragmentary or total traumatic amnesia. No study that has asked survivors the question has failed to find a robust number of persons reporting the phenomenon.

The difficulty of creating this phenomenon in laboratories using word lists with college sophomores is a problem of research design and paradigm; not a lack of effect of trauma on memory. And Dr. Jennifer Freyd has shown that word-list experiments carefully done do find traumatic memory effects.

As a therapist, I have worked with survivors of priest abuse and seen first hand their shattered faith in themselves, in the priesthood, in the church, in God. The notion that most victims of sexual abuse are gently groomed for an experience they do not find distasteful is shocking in its ignorance. Studies of the natural history of abusive families indicate that in familial abuse there is typically a mixture of family violence, parental alcoholism, and child sexual abuse.

Tell me that my clients who have been raped at gunpoint by drunken relatives firing guns near their heads to obtain compliance have not been harmed. Clancy’s letter is a biased document whose errors of logic and scholarship do not reflect the state of the science and serves to support the dangerous notion that children can give consent to and are not harmed by sexual abuse.

PHILIP J. KINSLER, PhD

Lyme , N.H.

http://www.psyfil.net/(Dr. Kinsler is Adjunct Assistant Professor of Psychiatry at  Dartmouth Medical School, where he supervises psychiatry  residents’ diagnostic and therapy work.  Dr. Kinsler is an experienced expert witness and testifies  broadly on criminal, civil, and family court matters.  Dr. Kinsler is extensively published in the fields of  psychological trauma, suggestibility in interviews of children  and adults, relational psychotherapy of trauma survivors, and ethical forensic practice.)

CLICK ON THIS LINK TO GO DIRECTLY TO THE CHILD ABUSE DIRECTORY SITE:

http://www.allmykids.com/Society/Issues/Children,_Youth_and_Family/Child_Abuse/directory.htm

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Home: Society: Issues: Children, Youth and Family: Child Abuse: Directory

child abuse
physical child abuse
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SOURCE:  http://www.emaxhealth.com/1506/50/35091/connection-between-poverty-and-child-abuse-neglect.html

Child Protection Agencies Rely on Trained ‘Mandated Reporters’ to Identify Abuse

HARRISBURG, Pa., Jan. 20 /PRNewswire-USNewswire/ — Information supplied by “mandated reporters” trained to recognize the signs of child abuse and neglect give child protection agencies a better shot at helping endangered or abused children, according to Lori Lower, long-time administrator of the Perry County Children & Youth Office.

Lower said most of the abuse and neglect investigations her agency handles are initiated as result of outside reports.

“The earlier we can intervene, the better it is for the child and the family,” Lower said. “If the agency isn’t aware, we’re not going to be able to do anything about it.”

Early intervention, she explained, can be the difference between being able to address and help solve problems and keep a family intact versus placing a child in foster care.

Basically, mandated reporters are the eyes and ears of a community. They’re people who come into contact with children in the course of performing their jobs and are required by law to report suspected abuse and neglect. They include nurses, health and social service workers, teachers and other school employees, law enforcement authorities, and members of the clergy.

Lower has worked with the Pennsylvania Family Support Alliance (PFSA) for the last seven years providing training to mandated reporters. PFSA programs trained 7,880 mandated reporters throughout Pennsylvania during the past year.

She said training helps mandated reporters understand the reporting process and their responsibilities and gives them confidence in their judgment. “People want to know how they can help,” she said.

PFSA recently went on record in support of state Senate Bill 1137, which would require three hours of abuse-identification training every five years for teachers and other mandated reporters employed by or under contract to public school districts, intermediate units, vocational-technical schools, charter schools, and private schools.

Lower said she was wholeheartedly in favor of the proposed legislation. She said that in her experience, the more training that mandated reporters receive “the more vested they are” in their responsibilities.

More than 25,650 cases of suspected child and student abuse were reported in Pennsylvania last year. Slightly more than 16 percent of those reports—more than 4,200—were substantiated.

Fifty children died from abuse, four more than 2007 and 19 more than 2006. Abuse also accounted for 6,140 injuries to children. Physical injuries ranged from bruises and abrasions to broken bones, skull fractures, and scaldings. The majority of injuries were sexual in nature, ranging from sexual assault to rape and incest.

For more information, visit the PFSA Web site at www.pa-fsa.org.

SOURCE Pennsylvania Family Support Alliance

RELATED LINKS
http://www.pa-fsa.org

Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder

Most people who experience a traumatic event will have reactions that may include shock, anger, nervousness, fear, and even guilt. These reactions are common; and for most people, they go away over time. For a person with PTSD, however, these feelings continue and even increase, becoming so strong that they keep the person from living a normal life. People with PTSD have symptoms for longer than one month and cannot function as well as before the event occurred.

What Are the Symptoms of PTSD?

Symptoms of PTSD most often begin within three months of the event. In some cases, however, they do not begin until years later. The severity and duration of the illness vary. Some people recover within six months, while others suffer much longer.

Symptoms of PTSD often are grouped into three main categories, including:

• Re-living: People with PTSD repeatedly re-live the ordeal through thoughts and memories of the trauma. These may include flashbacks, hallucinations, and nightmares. They also may feel great distress when certain things remind them of the trauma, such as the anniversary date of the event.
• Avoiding: The person may avoid people, places, thoughts, or situations that may remind him or her of the trauma. This can lead to feelings of detachment and isolation from family and friends, as well as a loss of interest in activities that the person once enjoyed.
• Increased arousal: These include excessive emotions; problems relating to others, including feeling or showing affection; difficulty falling or staying asleep; irritability; outbursts of anger; difficulty concentrating; and being “jumpy” or easily startled. The person may also suffer physical symptoms, such as increased blood pressure and heart rate, rapid breathing, muscle tension, nausea, and diarrhea.

Young children with PTSD may suffer from delayed development in areas such as toilet training, motor skills, and language.

Who Gets PTSD?

Everyone reacts to traumatic events differently. Each person is unique in his or her ability to manage fear and stress, and to cope with the threat posed by a traumatic event or situation. For that reason, not everyone who experiences or witnesses a trauma will develop PTSD. Further, the type of help and support a person receives from friends, family members and professionals following the trauma may influence the development of PTSD or the severity of symptoms.

PTSD was first brought to the attention of the medical community by war veterans, hence the names shell shock and battle fatigue syndrome. However, PTSD can occur in anyone who has experienced a traumatic event. People who have been abused as children or who have been repeatedly exposed to life-threatening situations are at greater risk for developing PTSD. Victims of trauma related to physical and sexual assault face the greatest risk for PTSD.

How Common Is PTSD?

About 3.6% of adult Americans — about 5.2 million people — suffer from PTSD during the course of a year, and an estimated 7.8 million Americans will experience PTSD at some point in their lives. PTSD can develop at any age, including childhood. Women are more likely to develop PTSD than are men. This may be due to the fact that women are more likely to be victims of domestic violence, abuse, and rape.

How Is PTSD Diagnosed?

If symptoms of PTSD are present, the doctor will begin an evaluation by performing a complete medical history and physical exam. Although there are no laboratory tests to specifically diagnose PTSD, the doctor may use various tests to rule out physical illness as the cause of the symptoms.

If no physical illness is found, you may be referred to a psychiatrist or psychologist, mental health professionals who are specially trained to diagnose and treat mental illnesses. Psychiatrists and psychologists use specially designed interview and assessment tools to evaluate a person for an anxiety disorder. The doctor bases his or her diagnosis of PTSD on reported symptoms, including any problems with functioning caused by the symptoms. The doctor then determines if the symptoms and degree of dysfunction indicate PTSD. PTSD is diagnosed if the person has symptoms of PTSD that last for more than one month.

How Is PTSD Treated?

The goal of treatment is to reduce the emotional and physical symptoms associated with PTSD, to improve daily functioning and to help the person better cope with the event that triggered the disorder. Treatment for PTSD may involve psychotherapy (a type of counseling), medication, or both.

Medication

Doctors use antidepressant medications to treat PTSD and to control the feelings of anxiety and its associated symptoms, including selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors (SSRIs) such as Paxil, Celexa, Luvox, Prozac, and Zoloft; and tricyclic antidepressants such as Elavil and Doxepin. Tranquilizers such as Ativan and Klonopin; mood stabilizers such as Depakote and Lamictal; and neuroleptics such as  Seroquel and Abilify are sometimes used.

Psychotherapy

Psychotherapy for PTSD involves helping the person learn skills to manage symptoms and develop ways of coping. Therapy also aims to teach the person and his or her family about the disorder, and help the person work through the fears associated with the traumatic event. A variety of psychotherapy approaches are used to treat people with PTSD, including:

• Cognitive-behavior therapy, which involves learning to recognize and change thought patterns that lead to troublesome emotions, feelings, and behavior.
• Exposure therapy, a type of cognitive-behavior therapy that involves having the person re-live the traumatic experience, or exposing the person to objects or situations that cause anxiety. This is done in a well-controlled and safe environment. Exposure therapy helps the person confront the fear and gradually become more comfortable with situations that are frightening and cause anxiety. This has been very successful at treating PTSD.
• Psychodynamic therapy focuses on helping the person examine personal values and the emotional conflicts caused by the traumatic event.
• Family therapy may be useful because the behavior of the person with PTSD can have an affect on other family members.
• Group therapy may be helpful by allowing the person to share thoughts, fears, and feelings with other people who have experienced traumatic events.
• Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR) is a complex form of psychotherapy that was initially designed to alleviate distress associated with traumatic memories but is now also used to treat phobias.

What Is the Outlook for People With PTSD?

Recovery from PTSD is a gradual and ongoing process. Symptoms of PTSD seldom disappear completely, but treatment can help sufferers learn to cope more effectively. Treatment can lead to fewer and less intense symptoms, as well as a greater ability to cope by managing feelings related to the trauma.

Research is ongoing into the factors that lead to PTSD and into finding new treatments.

Can PTSD Be Prevented?

Some studies suggest that early intervention with people who have suffered a trauma may reduce some of the symptoms of PTSD or prevent it all together.

SOURCE:  http://www.webmd.com/anxiety-panic/guide/post-traumatic-stress-disorder

DID YOU KNOW?

*1 in every 3 girls will be sexually molested before the age of 18
*1 in every 6 boys will be sexually molested before the age of 18
*Every 10 SECONDS a child is raped or killed in the U.S.
*Today up to 5 children will die from abuse or neglect
*In 13 seconds, another child will be abused in the U.S
*There were 2.9 million child abuse reports made in 1992
*ONLY 28% of the children identified as harmed by abuse are investigated
*Boys are at a greater risk of serious injury and of emotional neglect than are girls
*85% of the 1.2 – 1.5 million runaways are fleeing abuse at home
*80% of perpetrators are biological parents
*60 % of male survivors report at least one of their perpetrators to be female
*Natural mothers are the perpetrators of 93% of physical neglect, 86% of educational neglect, 78% of emotional neglect, 60% of physical abuse, and 55% of emotional abuse.
*Children in mother-only households are 4 times more likely to be fatally abused
*Female abusers are typically younger than male abusers.
*The median age was 30 years for women and 33 years for men
*Today 6 children will commit suicide
*Suicide is the 3rd leading cause of death (ages 15-24)
*Untreated child abuse increases the likelihood of arrest for a violent crime by 38 percent
*60 MILLION survivors are former victims of child sexual abuse in America today
*71 % of child sex offenders are under the age of 35
*38% of women & 20% of men have been sexually abused during adolescence
*It is estimated that 3%-6% of the clergy population has abused a child
*The typical child sex offender molests an average of 117 children–most of whom do not report the offense

~~~ Imagine the outcry if these statistics represented a disease, which was wiping out 5 children per day, victimizing millions, and who’s by-products where disabilities & expanding violence. Youth rights are really about human rights, and simple empathy is a giant first step to the benefits of increased awareness. The high jump in child abuse statistics shows the importance of youth rights by showing cases of frightening lack of knowledge!!~~~

….Go ahead….
IT’S TIME TO GET ANGRY ABOUT CHILD ABUSE IN OUR NATION!!

Grooming Articles

Many people think that child molesters are strange men who hide in bushes and snatch unsuspecting children off the streets. But in truth, a child is much more likely to be molested by someone he or she knows.

Before the molestation takes place, the perpetrator goes to great lengths to cement his or her relationship with the child to insure compliance. This behavior is called “grooming.” According to INTERPOL, “The majority of sex offenders groom their victims.”

In his publication, “Child Molesters: A Behavioral Analysis,” former FBI agent Kenneth V. Lanning lays out five stages of the grooming process: identifying a possible victim, collecting information about the intended victim, filling a need, lowering inhibitions, and initiating the abuse. The good news is that there are several opportunities during the process for savvy parents to spot what is going on and put a stop to it.

Notable Survivors

Here is a listing of famous and infamous survivors of child abuse, sexual abuse, spousal/dating abuse, and rape.
If there is a link for you to click, that means there is a profile for you to read. If you know of a notable survivor I don’t have up here, please let me know.
To return to the main page, click here.

• Alexander Pushkin (poet) abuse, info courtesy of AEST

• Alice Walker (author/activist) abuse

• Andrea Dworkin (author/activist) rape

• Angela Rose (activist) sexual assault (visit Angela’s site here )

• Angela Shelton (actress/model/director/actvist) incest

• Angie Dickenson (actress, etc) emotional abuse

• Anne Heche (actress) incest

• Anne Sexton (poet) child sexual abuse, info courteousy of AEST

• Antwone Fisher (author) emotional abuse/child sexual abuse

• Axl Rose (musician) child sexual abuse (according to IMDB.com)

• Baby Lyssa Chapman (famous bounty hunter/daughter of Dog) statutory rape

• Beethoven (composer) unspecified child abuse

• Beth Chapman (famous bail bondswoman/wife of Dog) domestic violence

• Bill Clinton (former U.S. President) secondary domestic violence

• Billie Holliday (singer) childhood rape

• Billy Connoly (comedian) incest

• Brett Butler (actress) domestic violence

• Carlos Santana (musician) child sexual abuse

• Carrie Otis (model) rape

• Chester Bennington (musician) child sexual abuse

• Christina Aguilera (singer) unspecified child abuse/secondary domestic violence

• Christina Applegate (actress) dating violence

• Christina Crawford (author) emotional abuse

• Cindy Williams (actress) emotional abuse

• Clara Bow (actress) incest

• Connie Francis (singer) rape

• Dave Mustaine (musician) child physical abuse/secondary domestic violence

• Dave Pelzer (author) multiple forms of abuse

• Derek Luke (actor) child sexual abuse

• Desi Arnaz, Jr. (actor) emotional abuse

• Dog the Bounty Hunter (famous bounty hunter/reality TV stars) child physical abuse

• Dorie VanStone (author) multiple forms of abuse

• Drew Barrymore (actress) unspecified child abuse

• Eleanor Roosevelt (former First Lady) unspecified child abuse

• Elizabeth I (Queen of England) teenage sexual assault, info courteousy of AEST

• Elizabeth Barrett Browning (poet) abuse, info courteousy of AEST

• Elizabeth Loftus (psychologist) child sexual abuse

• Ella Fitzgerald (singer) abuse

• Emme (model) emotional abuse

• Erin Gray (actress) unspecified child abuse

• Eve Ensler (playwright/actress) incest

• Fantasia (singer) teenage rape

• Farrah Faucett (actress) domestic violence

• Fiona Apple (musician) childhood rape

• Florence Holway (artist/activist) rape

• Fran Drescher (actress) rape

• Gabrielle Union (actress) rape

• Gavin DeBecker (violent crime expert) psychological abuse

• George Orwell (author) unspecified child abuse

• Greg Luganis (athlete) abuse

• Halle Berry (actress, model) domestic violence

• Henry Miller (writer) abuse, info courtesy of AEST

• Henry Rollins (musician) child sexual abuse

• Janice Dickenson (model) child physical & emotional abuse

• Janice Mirikitani (poet) incest, Janice’s story is featured on a DVD sold at RAINN’s site

• Johannes Brahms (composer) child sexual abuse, info courteousy of AEST

• Jonathan Davis (musician) child sexual abuse

• Joyce Meyer (evangelist, author) child physical abuse & incest

• Kirk Hammett (musician) child physical & sexual abuse

• Laveraneus Coles (athlete) child sexual abuse

• Leslie Triber (author/poet) abuse

• Lorena Bobbit – marital rape

• Lynn C. Tolson (author) incest/domestic violence/sexual assault

• Marie Waldrep (poet/activist) incest/domestic violence

• Marilyn Manson (musician) child sexual abuse

• Marilyn Monroe (actress) child physical & sexual abuse/childhood attempted rape (according to IMDB.com)/domestic violence

• Marilyn VanDerber Atler (former Miss America) incest

• Mary J. Blige (singer) emotional abuse/childhood rape/secondary domestic violence

• Mary Wollestonecraft (author) child physical abuse

• Mata Hari (famous spy) domestic violence

• Maya Angelou (author, poet) childhood rape

• Maynard James Keenan (musician) child sexual abuse

• Meat Loaf (musician) peer abuse/parental physical abuse (?)

• Mike Patton (musician) neglect/child sexual abuse

• Missy Elliot (rapper, producer) child sexual abuse/secondary domestic violence

• Nicole Brown Simpson – domestic violence (very likely murdered by OJ)

• Oprah Winfrey (talk show host) child sexual abuse

• Ozzy Osbourne (musician) emotional abuse

• Pamela Anderson (actress) rape/domestic violence

• Patricia Weaver Francisco (author) rape

• Patsy Cline (singer) domestic violence

• Patty Duke (actress, etc.) multiple forms of abuse, info courtesy of AEST

• Paula White (evangelist, author) child sexual abuse

• Queen Latifah (rapper/actress/model) child sexual abuse

• Rain Pryor (actress) child physical abuse/teenage sexual abuse

• Richard Nixon (former U.S. President) unspecified child abuse

• Rita Hayworth (actress) incest

• Robert Blake (actor) multiple forms of abuse, info courtesy of AEST

• Rosanne Arnold (actress) child sexual abuse

• Rose McGowan (actress) religious related (SRA?) abuse

• Rosie Perez (actress) child sexual abuse

• Rudyard Kipling (author) unspecified child abuse

• Sandra Dee (actress) incest

• Sinead O’Connor (musician) multiple forms of abuse, info courteousy of AEST

• Stasi Eldredge (author) rape

• Suzanne Somers (actress) emotional abuse

• Teri Hatcher (actress) incest

• Tina Turner (singer) domestic violence

• Tom Arnold (actor, etc) abuse, info courtesy of AEST

• Toni Childs (musician) abuse, info courteousy of AEST

• Tori Amos (musician) rape

• Virginia Woolf (author) incest

• Viva (actress) child sexual abuse

As Waters Passing By > Notable Survivors

WHAT DO I SAY?

A GUIDE FOR PARENTS WHOSE CHILD HAS BEEN SEXUALLY ABUSED

INTRODUCTION
Your child has been sexually assaulted. You may be feeling a broad range of emotions—outrage, anger, hurt, and a sense of responsibility. Several questions may also remain unanswered. Why did this happen to my child? Could I have prevented it? Will there be any long-term effects?
When the offender is a parent, the effects on the family are even more traumatic. Did it really happen? Should I leave? Will he go to jail? How could he do this?
Your immediate concern, however, must be for the child. When a child is
molested, parents often feel uncomfortable with talking about the abuse. Yet, the future adjustment of the child depends upon the responses of the parents. When a parent can be emotionally supportive and comforting, long-term negative effects can be lessened.
Studies show that one in four girls and one in six boys will become a victim of sexual assault before they reach the age of eighteen. Unfortunately, parents are neither encouraged nor taught how to talk to children about sexual assault.
The intent of this guide is to provide suggestions to parents in talking with their child, anticipating physical and emotional needs, and deciding if professional counseling is needed.

IS MY CHILD BEING TRUTHFUL?
When a child reports a sexual assault, parents often question whether the child is telling the truth or not. However, evidence indicates that children rarely make up stories about being sexually abused. Usually they are too fearful of the consequences to the offender, themselves, and the family members.
If your child tells you about being sexually assaulted, let them know that you believe them. If you question whether the abuse really occurred, talk with a child protection worker or mental health counselor.

FOLLOWING THE INITIAL REPORT
Parents often feel they are the last to find out about the abuse. After the sexual assault is reported, children are generally interviewed by a child protection worker and law enforcement officer. Within the initial interview, children are asked to give a detailed account about the sexual assault. Your child may or may not be upset about this interview.

Children often do not directly tell a parent about the molestation. They sometimes feel embarrassed, responsible, or fearful of a parent’s response. Do not blame your child for not telling you sooner. Try and understand what your child has experienced. Ask how he or she felt about the interview and try to determine if anything in the interview was confusing.

WHAT DO I SAY?
When a parent talks with a child about the sexual assault, the child is helped by:
— Understanding what actually happened
— Expressing feelings about the abuse
— Knowing a parent cares
— Realizing that he/she is not responsible for the abuse

Your ability to listen to your child is important because sexual abuse evokes strong feelings in everyone. The following guidelines suggest ways a parent can talk with a child about sexual abuse.

1. Find a time and place to talk with your child as soon as possible. Choose a
place where you will not be interrupted and allow sufficient time to talk.
2. Ask your child to tell you about the sexual assault. Let your child tell you
what happened in his/her own words and try not to interrupt.
3. Do not pressure your child to talk. Discontinue the discussion when your
child indicates a desire to stop.
Example— “I can see it’s hard to talk about this. We can talk more later if
you want.”
4. Do not contradict your child’s story. Listen and be supportive to what your
child says about the abuse.
5. Do not blame your child for the sexual assault or ask “why” questions.
Some-times in talking with a child, parents express anger. It may be con-
fusing to the child as to whether you are angry with the offender or the
child. Children are NOT responsible for the sexual abuse even though
they may often feel to blame. A child should be assured that the offender
is the one responsible.
6. Understand that your child may care about the offender. When the
offender is a parent or close friend, a child may be concerned about what
will happen to that person. Frequent expressions of anger by a parent
about the offender may be upsetting to the child. Help your child under-
stand that what the offender did was wrong and he needs help to stop
this type of behavior.
7. Reassure your child by letting him/her know that you are sorry this has
happened to them and you will protect him/her from further abuse. Let
your child know that they can tell you if anyone tries to touch them in this
way again.
8. Talk with other children in the family. When the offender is a parent,
brothers and/or sisters need to understand that the offender, not the child is
responsible. The child who has been abused should be included in the
discussions if he/she wants to be.

IS MEDICAL ATTENTION NECESSARY?
Generally, children are not seriously injured by a sexual assault. However, it is advisable to have your child examined by a medical professional to check for
injuries. A medical exam can reassure a child that no physical damage has
occurred. An exam, however, does not necessarily confirm or disprove a child’s
story of sexual assault.

HOW WILL MY CHILD REACT?
Each child reacts differently to a sexual assault based on the child’s personality, age, type of abuse, relationship with the offender, and reactions of family and friends.
Effects may occur over a period of weeks, months, or years following the abuse.

Common symptoms that may occur immediately following the abuse include:
— Sleep disturbances
— Loss of appetite
— Depression
— Fears
— Physical problems such as stomach aches and migraine headaches
— Regressive behaviors such as thumb-sucking, bed wetting, and baby talk
— Sexual acting out behaviors such as inappropriately kissing or touching other
children or adults
— Problems at school

ATTENDING PROFESSIONAL COUNSELING
Children’s reactions to therapy vary and some may not want to attend. However, when possible, it is important that a child discuss the abuse. Very few children have no feelings about the abuse. Parents can aid in their child’s healing by:
— Stating that therapy can be helpful and encouraging attendance.
— Recognizing that a child may feel angry, depressed, or physically upset during
treatment. When a child begins to talk about the abuse, these symptoms are
frequently present.
— Talking with your child during or following counseling if needed.
— Letting the therapist know if the child has misunderstood what is said in treat-
ment, if symptoms continue, or if the child does not want to continue.

TAKING CARE OF YOURSELF
Parents must also be concerned about their own feelings about the abuse. Following the reporting process, parents often experience many negative feelings toward their child. Even the most caring parents may feel:
— Angry that the child did not tell them sooner
— Upset that the child did not tell them first
— Fearful that the child initiated the abuse
— Hurt and embarrassed that the child was abused
Such feelings should not be expressed to the child. Parents need to find friends or a counselor with whom they can talk about these and other feelings. Talking to someone who understands will benefit you and in turn, your child.

A Profile of the Child Molester

by Ken Wooden

(http://www.childluresprevention.com/about/kwooden.asp)

During my two decades of work as an investigative reporter, I interviewed hundreds of convicted child molesters in prisons across America. My objective was to uncover how they had lured children and teens into abuse and worse. My intention was also to generate a criminal profile that could be shared with parents and law enforcement. Instead, I found child molesters and abductors to be a diverse group that possesses no tidy criminal profile.

So who are these sexual predators?

In short, pedophilia, or adult sexual attraction to children, does not discriminate by race, gender, class, or age.

One child pornography sting operation by the U.S. Justice Department and Customs Postal Inspectors resulted in well over two hundred arrests. The occupations of those arrested was a virtual rainbow of American life, representing 44% of all occupations listed by the U.S. Department of Labor.

How many child molesters live in the United States?

Approximately 400,000 convicted pedophiles currently reside in the United States, according to Department of Justice estimates.*

Are there really female child molesters?

Yes. A 2000 statistical report by the US Department of Justice* found that female offenders victimized:

How many victims does a child molester average?

Interviews guaranteeing complete confidentiality and immunity from prosecution, conducted by Emory University psychiatrist Dr. Gene Abel*, uncovered that:

How do child molesters get into situations where they can exploit children?

Due to the nature of their sexual addiction, few pedophiles are able to resist their powerful urges to initiate contact with children and will go to great lengths to do so. Common strategies include:

What is the most common method used by child molesters?

The Affection Lure. (See Think First & Stay Safe Parent Guide) Most victims of abuse are “groomed” over a period of weeks, months, or years. The Affection Lure is used both offline and online to seduce unsuspecting youngsters in need of love and attention. Child molesters have repeatedly told me: When there’s a physically or emotionally absent parent in the picture, it makes the child more vulnerable than ever.

Which age group is most often targeted by child molesters?

In the interviews I conducted, the majority of molesters cited a preference for children on the brink of puberty. This is the age of sexual awakening, making it easy for molesters to prey on the sexual curiosity and ignorance of youngsters. To quote one of the predators I interviewed, “Give me a kid who knows nothing about sex, and you’ve given me my next victim.”

While we as parents are inclined to give pre-teen children more freedom and less supervision, this age group is actually the most vulnerable to abuse and abduction. We must talk frankly and often to our children about “the birds and the bees” and not allow child molesters to educate our children for us.

Wouldn’t a vigilant parent be able to detect a child molester, just by their actions?

Not necessarily. Always remember:

Do kids and teens ever sexually abuse other children?

Sadly, yes – and many of these juvenile offenders are victims of sexual abuse themselves. A U.S. Department of Justice, Bureau of Justice Statistics report* found that:

What types of assaults were these?

Juvenile offenders under the age of 12 were responsible for:

Juvenile offenders ages 12 – 18 were responsible for:

When and where did these assaults usually happen?

The peak time for juvenile assaults was 3 pm, after school. Other spikes in the number of incidents were at the traditional meal times of 8 am, noon and 6 pm. Most of these assaults happened in the home of the victim, the home of the offender, or another residence.*

How many of these assaults were by family members?

Are there groups of organized pedophiles that prey on children?

Yes. Small groups of militant and highly organized child molesters operate worldwide through pedophile organizations, whose members claim genuine concern for the welfare of children. The actual number of members in these organizations is unknown, though their power is evident. One pedophile organization’s newsletter correctly identified ten sting operations in five different states. Another exposed and compromised four federal sting operations. Clearly, these organizations have connections.

What are their beliefs and goals?

In general, these groups believe that sex with children is harmless; some even claim that sexual relations are healthy for children. Their goals include decriminalizing child molestation and lowering the age of consent.

Where do they meet?

In addition to attending pedophile conferences and conventions, members now meet primarily via the Internet where they may swap methods, success stories, even names, descriptions, and images of children. Since the early 1980’s, they have exploited the Internet to communicate with one another, spreading their propaganda to anyone who will listen.

Aren’t their activities illegal?

Most pedophile groups and members are careful to keep their public activities within the realm of protected civil liberties.

In 2006, a new political party (PNVD) was established in the Netherlands. Commonly referred to as “the Pedophile Party,” it seeks to lower the age of consent from 16 to 12. Opponents had asked The Hague District Court to bar the party from registering for national elections, but Judge H. Hofhuis ruled: “Freedom of expression, freedom … of association, including the freedom to set up a political party, can be seen as the basis for a democratic society.”

Are these pedophile groups a real threat?

While the average child molester does not belong to a pedophile organization, we would be foolish not to take seriously any group whose members are committed to sexual activity with children.

Final Thoughts:

While there are sexual predators who are organized and whose activities cause public ire, it is the millions of individual sexual predators worldwide whose day-to-day actions and steadfast determination are a far greater threat to the safety of our children. Knowing this – and knowing that we cannot be with our children every moment of every day – it is essential that we teach them how to recognize and evade the lures used for generations by sexual predators of every kind. As I told President Bush during the 2002 White House Conference on Missing, Exploited and Runaway Children, “If predators are using the lures, shouldn’t we be teaching our children these lures?”

Parents would do well to heed the steady increase in juvenile perpetrators, as well as the 3 pm peak for child sexual assaults. This speaks greatly to the need for after school facilities and activities for latch-key children who are at greater risk of victimization, even in their own homes.

It is also important to remember that 2/3rds of all crimes are never reported. When it comes to juvenile sexual assaults, the percentage of unreported crimes is undoubtedly higher, given the nature of the crimes and the tender age of victims.

– Ken Wooden

*Sexual Assault of Young Children as Reported to Law Enforcement: Victim, Incident, and Offender Characteristics, by Howard N. Snyder, Ph.D.; National Center for Juvenile Justice, July 2000, U.S. Department of Justice, Office of Justice Programs